2015 in a nutshell

Hello Lovelies!

2015 has been quite a year of personal and spiritual growth. The first half of the year was quite exciting, then my doggy passed away in April, and things started spiralling downwards from there. Work has always been bad but it got really really bad and I knew I had to remove myself from that toxic environment before my family checked me in to IMH.

Sheru. My hunny bunny baby juju.. enjoying his last days at his favourite East Coast Beach. He passed on the next day in our arms at home. Dogs are better than men. Seriously.

My baby’s passing was the catalyst that made me realise I needed to change my life. I started 2015 at 128kg, but ballooned up to 131.5kg due to crazy stress. I was working crazy hours till 4-5am on days at end, getting sick, bullied and going mad while others were so carefree watching movies and going for hour long phone breaks at work. So, in June 2015, I finally walked out of that Indian Business Park with what little money I had in my pocket, with no concrete plans for what lay ahead, but happy with a smile on my face.

Sometimes I get angry with myself cos I am too strong for my own good. At the expense of proving to myself that I am not a quitter, I really get burnt out along the way. Damn you mayakorrs! Stop fighting so much! You don’t need to prove how long you can last, if deep down within you, you know that it is not right. If something doesn’t work out, just leave and move on to the next thing.

Along the way, I also limited my exposure with negative people. I started learning how to depend on myself and not look to others to keep me happy. Why, I did go out a lot! But I stopped begging people to hang out with me. I went on countless dates, met many interesting people (a Viking as well.. Hello Karsten!!), and built on the friendships that mean something to me. Friendship is a 2-way street. And friends build you up, not tear you down and fill your mind with doubt after doubt. Life is really better without having to justify yourself and your actions to the people around you.

31 Dec 2014, Bangkok. 128kg.

I think the people that came into my life this year really changed my lifestyle and me as a whole. I think I am better at not worrying too much. I cut back my shopaholic tendencies and eating at wherever whenever. I have come to realise that I rather pay for experiences. Things that enrich my life. Cos that is what is important. It’s not about the PRADA that you carry to the beach. It is the conversations, the people, the company and that exchange of energy that you have with people.

I can’t believe that I have developed and grown so much, over the last 6 months especially. It is definitely not easy, trust me.

Sometimes I feel like a failure because I am jobless, manless, cashless, and going in to 3-0, this is not where I envisioned myself to be. But I guess I cannot stop the clock, so I am gonna learn to embrace this instead.

1988: At 2 years old, with dad at the National Museum, Singapore.         2010: Actual year 2009. Me at one of my biggest when I went for the Biggest Loser Asia Season 1 auditions with my sis. Think I was 130kg here. 2015: Me at 128kg, but with a body recomposition.

I have started writing my book. I am gonna launch my online business. Surely I am not a failure. I came too far… changed my whole life around.. fought against the grain to create this life I never imagined possible..

Me at my 2nd auditions in 2010. And me in the gym in 2015. 129kg vs 125kg. I think I had a body recomposition. But sometimes, I think I look the same. I’m a bit cocked up in my head, I know.. 🙂

Yesterday, for the first time in my life, I told my friends we will go on the dance floor to dance to the live band. Right. Me. The shy girl who never parties, club or dance. Damn I even joined the snake dance on the dance floor. What’s up mayakorrs! You really surprise me sometimes!

Live each day for what it is, for are you ready to die tomorrow?

In a nutshell:

1. remove yourself from toxic environments
2. limit exposure to negative people
3. live for experiences that enrich your life
4. don’t be too hard on yourself
5. only YOU can change your life

 

Cheers and I wish you all the very best for the upcoming year!

In Love and Light,
Maya Korrs

26 Dec 2015. I’m Blonde. I’m Hott. I’m Happy. I’m Free.

 

 

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Interim message

I know I have been gone for some time.. There is so much I need to post.. but I have been busy with my new baby, which I will reveal in due time.

Had quite a depressive streak recently. I don’t know if it is my PCOS acting up on me and causing all these crazy emotions or maybe me approaching my big 3-0 in a month’s time.

I have been sitting down in Shenton Way since 1pm.. 7 hours down now.. having a huge life revelation in my head. I typed so much but then decided I don’t want to put the negative out.

I feel like a FAILURE cos I am nowhere near where I want to be. I know that I have been too harsh on myself. Very bad habit, I know.

Enough. Today, I have decided to stop fighting this universe, put my faith in God and trust the universe will do it’s job. What is within my control, I will act on it. What is beyond my reach, I let the universe handle it. What is meant for me, will be mine.

And you know when I post pics up of me in gym and my workout etc on FB, I don’t expect people to be inspired by that. I do that cos I want to chronicle my workout/ look for the day/ body. And when I receive the out-of-the blue message to keep on fighting, or all the lovely words of how I inspire you to not give up, it really really really makes my day. So thank you.

Ok time to start this baby rolling if I want to celebrate my 30th birthday on 10th Dec 2016, 11 months overdue.

I really appreciate your continued support all these years.. 5 years and counting…

 

In Love and Light,
Maya